Growing Old Sucks

The Life and Tribulations of an Almost 40 Years Old

Time of Death: July 1, 2042 - Will They Pimp my Casket?

Filed under: Thinking Too Much — comments at 2:07 pm on Sunday, April 23, 2006

Well, for a slightly depressing experience, use the Death Clock.

According to the Death Clock, I will die on July 1, 2042.  Another 1,141,961,527 seconds to live.  I can now put that in my agenda and make the necessary arrangements.  I can change my time of death by gaining/losing weight or by starting smoking.  I didn’t know I had so much control on my destiny.

Many people see funeral planning as an extension of will and estate planning.  Me, I don’t really care what they’ll do with my dead body.  If I had to decide now, I would go directly to cremation (do not pass GO and do no collect $200).  None of that traditional funeral or burial.  Burn baby burn.

Caskets are so expensive but also, very boring.  I’m waiting for the day when we see a show on TV called “Pimp My Casket”.  Everyone should have a flat screen TV and an XBox in their casket.  What about some pimping wheels on my last resting place?  Or a headstone with some bling and neon lights?  Show Some Love and “Pimp My Hearse”!

The bottom line is that I want something very simple: quick cremation and then flush what’s left down the toilet.  If my friends and family want something more, it is completely up to them.  Anyway, I am hoping to outlive all of them so it won’t matter.  I just have to eat healthier, work out regularly, have a positive outlook on life, …. Who am I kidding? July 1, 2042 it is.

I have now only 1,141,959,438 seconds left.  I better find something meaningful to do.

R.I.P.

46 Comments »

6

Comment by Dave

April 24, 2006 @ 7:11 pm

Yeah, you know, I have heard about that Death Clock thing, but to tell you the truth, I just don’t think I need any reminders.

I’m a little older than you are, but not all that old. Lately too many people I know (or know of) have been dying in their 40s and 50s. My wife’s off to a funeral for an uncle right now.

And I think I’m with you about the “disposal of the body” thing. Have a big party, if you want, but don’t make a fetish of my remains.

7

Comment by Sir Fluffy

April 25, 2006 @ 2:29 pm

I ended up checking the death clock following the death of someone close to my age. Makes you think about your finality.

33

Comment by Rhea

September 24, 2006 @ 8:09 am

The Death Clock told me I am gonna die pretty young, so, of course, I doubt its accuracy. I like the idea of Pimping Your Casket. You wanna know a really cheap way to go? Cremation. I found out in the Boston area (where I live) it’s less than 300 bucks.

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